The Slippery Side of Perfect

(Chapter 9 from the book "The Chicken Who Didn't Know Where To Lay Her Eggs")

Mike and Paula had always gone to church on Sunday, every Sunday.

April rarely made it more than a few times a year.

Sunday was often the only day of the week she had for a little time for herself and to rest up. Between teaching, taking Tadpole to baseball or football practice, cleaning house, and occasionally going on a date, she said she had almost no free time.

Mike and Paula would've preferred that April had gone more often, but they bit their tongues. They both remembered how busy they had been when they were younger.

Besides, April was always responsible and a good mother. Moreover, she had always been there when her mother needed her, and that had meant a lot during the couple of years when things were really hard for the both of them.

After Shellie and Dingo came to live with April and Tadpole, Mike dropped by at least once a day. He still worked as hard as ever on the farm, but he seemed somewhat lost without Paula. He didn't quite know what to do with himself when he had free time. So he worked as much as possible just to keep from having any. He had also driven the SUV into the ditch twice since she had been away. The first time didn't do any damage, but the second time left the SUV in the shop for two weeks.

Every time he dropped by, he mentioned how much he missed Paula. He talked about what a calming effect she had on him. He said he could get all worked up by things on the farm, and then he could come home to Paula and she would make all his worries disappear or not seem so important.

April knew exactly what he was talking about. She remembered times she had gotten highly upset as a little girl, and her mother had simply wiped away her troubles by saying next to nothing and doing next to nothing. April knew that it was a quality she lacked in herself. She had worked hard on acquiring it but without much success. She occasionally acknowledged that she was much better at spotting things that were not right than things that were right.

Shellie also missed Paula for the same reason. She got along well enough with April and Mike, but neither of them could replace Paula. Both April and Mike hardly ever sat still. An easy chair was like an instrument of torture to them. They always had to be doing something. Yet, they seemed to only get half as much done as Paula.

A good example was Sunday supper. Paula had always been able to throw together a tasty supper on the spur of the moment when the preacher and his family showed up unexpectedly. She just went in the kitchen, hummed her favorite tunes as she cooked, and had everything ready in 45 minutes.

If anyone showed up at April's house unexpectedly, all they got was a glass of water. April always seemed to be low on food even though she went shopping every Saturday. She usually planned every meal a week in advance and in great detail, and it was difficult for her to fit in any unplanned ones along the way. If she did, she would redo her list for the rest of the week.

That's why Mike let her know a few days ahead when he would come by for supper. Otherwise, he knew that he wouldn't get anything to eat and that he would have to cook for himself. He was almost fearful of cooking for himself. He just didn't know what to do. There had previously been only one short period in his life when he hadn't had someone to cook for him, and that was the few months between when his first wife divorced him and he met April's mother. They had been the unhappiest months in his life.

One evening when Mike came by for supper and he and April and Tadpole were sitting at the table, he suggested to April, "Why don't you invite the preacher out this Sunday? He hasn't been out in quite a while."

April put her fork down and placed her hands on the table. She didn't reply for several seconds.

Finally, she said, "He's never been to my house before. It'll take me a while to get ready."

Mike took a bite of mustard greens, chewed slowly, then said, "No hurry. You could make something simple. He doesn't expect anything fancy."

"We'll see," April responded. "I'll have to see what I have and see when I have time to give the house a good cleaning."

Mike wondered what she had to clean. To him, the house was already as clean as it could get. He kept his thoughts to himself.

Several weeks later, Mike brought up the idea again. He told her he would help her buy everything she needed.

April got a rather dismayed look on her face but she finally said OK, as long as Mike would give her two weeks.

She suggested that Mike invite the preacher and his family over for 6:00 p.m. on Sunday in two weeks.

During those two weeks, April cleaned house from top to bottom. She also made a detailed plan of the Sunday supper, with seating arrangements. She drew up a list of supplies she needed and sent Mike to town to buy them.

Mike had to make three different trips. He wasn't used to buying groceries and didn't know it could be so difficult. The first time, he only bought half of what April needed. The second time, he didn't buy the right brands. Finally, on the third trip, he got everything right. He wondered why Paula had never complained. She had simply gone to the store, bought things and then come home. He had never paid any attention.

Sunday evening finally arrived. April had the entire meal ready almost an hour ahead of time. She had prepared roast beef with gravy, rice, green peas, a salad, corn-on-the-cob, French bread and cornbread, plus peach cobbler with vanilla ice cream for dessert. She made ice tea, lemonade and orange juice to drink.

She placed everything in the oven to keep it warm and went to get ready herself.
The preacher, his wife, and their two children showed up half an hour early.
April had herself only half ready. She made them wait at the door while she frantically tried to finish fixing her hair and make-up. Fortunately, Mike showed up at that moment and brought the guests into the kitchen.

April finally came out of the bathroom. Her hair and make-up were perfect. She wore a matching red blouse and skirt. She had high heels on her feet. They were also red.
The preacher's mouth dropped open and his face blushed red. He had never seen April looked so striking.

Everyone told her how fabulous she looked.

She smiled regally and insisted that Mike take them all in the living room while she finished putting things on the table.

The preacher's wife offered to help her, but April assured her she had it all under control.

Right at 6:00, April came into the living room. She announced that supper was served.
All of them moved to dining room and took their assigned seats around the table.

The preacher invited them to close their eyes and he started saying a prayer.

Tadpole wasn't used to this routine. Before the preacher was finished, he opened his eyes and reached for a piece of cornbread.

April, who was expecting something like that and had one eye slightly open, grabbed his hand and shoved it back in his lap.

The preacher finally said, "Amen!"

Everyone opened their eyes, and the preacher's wife said, "This looks lovely! I hope you didn't go to too much trouble."

April winced slightly. She replied, "Oh, no! Not at all! I just threw a few things together. Hope you enjoy it!"

Then the preacher asked, "Do you have any of Shellie's famous devilled eggs?"

April's face dropped. She hadn't even thought about making devilled eggs. Whenever Shellie laid eggs, she usually threw them away. She only cooked with eggs that she had bought from the store. She said she had no idea what might be in the ones Shellie laid.

A moment of silence followed.

The preacher's wife finally said, "Oh, honey! You don't need to eat them EVERY time! Look at all these wonderful special dishes April has fixed for us."

April smiled weakly.

Mike suddenly brought up some matter about the church and launched into conversation with the preacher.

Throughout the rest of the meal, the preacher, his wife, and Mike periodically bragged about how good the meal was.

April thanked them graciously each time.

Everyone smiled a lot during supper. However, no one laughed the way the did when Paula served supper. Sometimes, long pauses of silence would stretch out before anyone said anything.

During those pauses, Shellie could hear them all eating the cobs of corn even though she was on her counter perch in the kitchen. They sounded like a herd of miniature cows to her.

When supper was finally over, April insisted that all her guests go into the living room. She busied herself with cleaning up the table. She wouldn't let the preacher's wife help.

Finally, April joined the rest of them. They all talked about half an hour longer.
Around 8:00, the preacher and his family went home. Mike went home a few minutes later.

April came into the kitchen, looked at Shellie, and, for the first time in her life, spoke to Shellie as though she were a person.

"Why didn't you tell me?"